Meet Chris, everyone!
If you've seen some of my catch up entries, you already know we've been friends for more than 15 years. You know he's handsome, you know he's brilliant, and you know he's great with the boys.
He's also a car enthusiast, knows more about various aircraft than the whole of Boeing, and could probably beat MacGyver at MacGyvering. *Grin*
He's always been ridiculously intelligent. His childhood was spent tinkering with everything thanks to his parents who not only encouraged it, but took him to workshops and programs that would actively teach him how! He's a natural sponge for information and somehow keeps it all pristinely locked away for recall at a moment's notice.
Long before we ever made googly eyes at one another, we engaged in the most entertaining, thought-provoking conversations. While the rest of the group would drift into debates about comic characters or video games, we'd be off into the weeds discussing politics, social constructs and philosophy. We've always enjoyed deep conversations with one another, and somehow there's always new fodder for us to attack.
Since pairing ourselves up, we routinely watch programming that grapples with complex problems or interesting historical quandaries. We'll share current events, play devil's advocate, or listen to interviews with prominent philosophical contemporaries. I'll ask an outlandish question that forces him to pull the brakes and really yank at the underpinnings of his belief set, and then he'll drop an atom bomb into my lap that has me spiraling off into tangents for DAYS. Through it all, we learn, we laugh, and we grow in our understanding of the world, each other, and ourselves.
I cannot overstate how much I appreciate that intellectual stimulation.
Then there's his natural propensity to fix everything... he's an engineer by trade, so he is a professional (and highly skilled) problem solver. Whether the problem is mechanical in nature (fixing a broken appliance) or situational (the kids aren't doing what they're supposed to be doing), he's able to effectively diagnose it and figure out efficient steps that rectify whatever is amiss.
He also relishes his role as step-father. Since signing on, he's put so much time, thought and energy into parenting them properly. Just last night, we had a talk about Vincent's unique challenges, specifically stemming from a marked increase in verbal/auditory stimming. He's invested in helping them both succeed as men, and that manifests in a million different ways.
Last weekend, he let Nate help him build a shed in the backyard which made Nate swear he was a professional architect. Ha ha! He's so patient with them, but isn't afraid to come down hard if necessary to keep them on the straight and narrow. I take so much comfort in him as their role model for masculinity. I worried so much for their prospects as adult men before Chris arrived, but now that he's taken on the task of showing them what a true man looks like, I feel genuine relief for their futures.
He is a true partner. I swear he's more supportive of me than I am 90% of the time! Whether it's getting off the couch to help me up while I'm a pregnant turtle, offering to pick up groceries to knock something off my to-do list, or sneaking out in the morning (and thus, forgoing the morning coffee and lunch I'd make for him) so I can catch up on sleep, he is outlandishly thoughtful. Just as I recognize all that he does for our family, he recognizes all I do by not waiting for me to ask for help but offering it when he sees the opportunity present itself.
My favorite is him not complaining when I order out these days because I can't stand to be near an oven. Uuuuugh, I'm really looking forward to having Nico OUTSIDE of me...
Anyway, I could wax on forever about how wonderful he is. It still amazes me that we ended up together. A couple days ago, I was smiling up at him like an idiot and he laughed asking, "What?"
I answered, "If you'd have told me that you and I would end up together, I would've laughed you off a cliff. I sometimes still can't believe it. It's insane." He agreed. It really is insane when you think about it. But when has God ever made a lick of sense to us mere mortals?
That said, I'm genuinely glad God's the One in control, because there's no better husband, father, or friend that I could have chosen for myself and my children. I always go back to that photo I shared in this entry about God banishing fear:
It still rings 1,000% true. I was holding a tattered, germ-ridden teddy bear and God was holding Chris behind His back. Ha ha! Luckily, I was blessed with the gift of Faith and an unshakable trust in God's desire to care for each of us individually, so I had no real problem handing over the trash bear. I just had no idea that the prize bear was someone I already loved and respected so much.
So that's Chris in a large nutshell. At 6'4" and a delicious amount of muscle, a large nutshell is the only one I can fit him in. *Grin*
Trust God, friends. I cannot emphasize that enough. If you learn nothing else from my story, learn this: the same God who cares for the birds in the sky and the flowers of the field cares infinitely more about you than those birds and flowers (Matt 6:26-30). He cares so much that He came to dwell among us, taking on our humanity to elevate it to the Divine. He wants your joy and happiness and cannot be outdone in love. So love Him, trust Him, and recognize that short-term pain falls away and becomes background noise as the life He created you for unfurls into eternity.
He's got you, friend. He's got you.
She poured her heart and soul into EVERYTHING, and while stitching everything together, she would pray for whoever would end up using whatever she was making:
When I finally realized she was serious, I cried. I felt so overwhelmed with gratitude, unworthiness, and awe that I couldn't respond to her e-mail for more than a week. Every time I would try, words would fail me and I'd just begin crying again. To think that she would not only WANT to do this, but consider it a personal honor... guys... I'm tearing up again just thinking of how wonderful she is.
Karen lives out in Ohio, so she asked that I send her my measurements. She asked if I had anything in mind, and I didn't. My only request was that she use lightweight lace because I'd be married in May. She sent me a photo of a style she thought would be perfect for me and I immediately approved. Of course she'd pick out something perfect. SHE is perfect.
I didn't hear much from her in the months that followed. To be fair, I was inundated with changing plans around due to the impending pandemic, moving Chris home, and trying to sort out virtual learning for the boys. She was very clearly busy, too, because the day we finally got Chris home, a package was waiting for us when we arrived. It was the dress!
Upon opening it, I could hardly contain myself. It was more stunning than I had anticipated. The lace was SUPREMELY soft and for as large as the dress was, it was super lightweight. I'm not entirely sure how she managed that.
She included a cathedral length veil that was trimmed in the same lace she used to make the dress. I didn't end up using it due to COVID, but I still have it tucked away with the dress. She sent me the sweetest letter ever with the dress, assuring me that every stitch was offered as a prayer for our marriage. And now I own an original piece of artwork from one of my most beloved artistic friends. I cannot overstate how much I appreciate this grace.
So to Karen, I love you ridiculous amounts. I cannot ever thank you enough for giving so freely of yourself to ensure that I had something so beautiful to wear. I cherish it, just as I cherish our friendship. You are a saint, my friend, and I hope to be much, MUCH more like you when I "grow up."
And yes, Chris absolutely wiped a tear from his eye when he saw me in it. Even he was blown away by your ability to clean me up. *Grin*
Love you, friend. Thank you.
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