My 20/20 on 2020
While I recognize 2020 was a challenging and frustrating year for so many people, I am grateful that it turned out to be a year of incredible blessings for my family and I.
Chris and I kicked off the New Year together. He was still living in Kansas, and hadn't had any job offers in the area. We were able to celebrate Christmas with the boys and welcome 2020 with hopeful expectation.
He was to begin as soon as possible!
The biggest hurdle of all had finally been overcome. He had been searching for so long to find something suitable back home, and finally, God had opened the door, just as I knew He would.
When he flew back home, we had a plan in place that would get him home in time to start his new job in April.
Vince and Nate were doing so well, too! Vince was excelling in 4th grade and Nate was growing by leaps and bounds. While they can certainly bicker, they're usually pretty good together. Nate still worships Vince and Vince enjoys lording around his baby brother. We had all settled nicely into our new house and everyone was excited for Chris to finally move home for good, especially because Chris was such a fun playmate for them!
When March arrived, the first inklings of COVID-19 were starting to make their way to us. My wonderful friend (and then-boss) started warning me against traveling out of state. My brother was SUPER adamant about me not flying down to Kansas to then drive through multiple states to get him home. It seemed like the entire world had suddenly gone crazy.
There was *no way* I was going to leave Chris stranded in Kansas when we FINALLY had the ability to get him home. I was on pins and needles the week leading up to my flight because some airlines were closing, some states were shutting down, etc.
Finally, I was able to board and get to Kansas. We spent a few days packing, and then began our 1,200 mile road trip home. Knowing we'd need to have things to look forward to, I planned a few socially safe excursions between Kansas and New Jersey:
We split the drive over three days. We left after having breakfast on Saturday morning, stopping for fuel every 2.5 hours or so. While I had been worried an 18 hour drive might be daunting, all the excursions helped give us quirky fun to break it all up. The drive blew by, and before we knew it, we were HOME.
That meant we FINALLY got to build out the guitar wall I had devised the moment I stepped foot into the new house... we put it together that weekend and I am STILL over the moon for it, much like everyone else who has come through our door since!
April saw the lockdown was in full swing. It appears we got him home just in time! However, both of us are considered essential workers, so we were both going into the office regularly. Vince had swapped to remote learning. Nate was home for about 2 months before the state began re-allowing daycares to reopen. In that time, he really started to struggle. My little extrovert was beside himself not having his little peers to play with daily. While Vince LOVED not having to go into school every day, Nate was genuinely getting depressed. The day he was finally allowed back into daycare, he cried. He actually cried tears of joy because he missed everyone so much.
In the meantime, though, we did what we could to give them things to look forward to. We joined a few car parades, went up to do a drive-by of Mom-Mom's house, Uncle Ray's house and Auntie Mary's house, learned how to polish gemstones, make Jell-o and build AMAZING forts. We even set up a pinata in the backyard for them to take their frustrations out on!
All this time, Chris and I were supposed to be planning our wedding. We had sent out invitations, chose menus, and my gorgeous dress (which will get its own post) had arrived. Things were in the air due to COVID, and we were told multiple times (by many, many people) to just postpone until things returned to normal. There's no way, after all, we'd be able to make it happen with so many restrictions.
Telling me I can’t do something is pretty much a guaranteed way of ensuring it gets done because I’m a spiteful sonofagun who is creative, capable, and hella good at talking people into following my lead. I convinced the pastor to allow us to have the service by agreeing to cut our numbers to match the allotted funeral capacities (10 people). I then sorted things out with the county in order to get us virtually approved for licensing (which was tricky since Chris' license was still listed as out-of-state due to DMVs being closed).
Finally, we let everyone know that we were downgrading the ceremony and reception to match capacity. I organized a videographer to be present to stream the ceremony live so that those who could not be present could still feel as though they were. I also made sure to livestream throughout the day via social media to give people a glimpse into the fun!
All in all, it was PERFECT. Everything- every single thing- was utter perfection. The weather, the people, the love... God is so good, people. Just trust Him; He always provides a way.
From there, we found ourselves in the middle of summer. Restrictions were beginning to ease, and the boys were back to enjoying their peers in camp (for Vince) and daycare (for Nate). Chris was keeping them entertained and learning with his many hands-on science projects. Rockets, experiments with arduinos, and Nerf wars were becoming commonplace. It was and is so gratifying for me to see them so enamored by Chris. Likewise, he relishes their affection and enjoys the opportunity to help them learn and grow.
When the school year arrived, I was proud of the diocesan schools for making the decision to reopen with safety protocols in place. Nate had graduated from daycare and started as a kindergartener which was great for Vince. He was excited to show Nate around and dutifully took him to his classroom every day. He even began enjoying aftercare now that he had his brother to play with.
As for me, I work in nonprofit Development. My biggest source of fundraising revenue tends to be from in-person events. With COVID throwing a wrench into that, I was forced to get super creative in terms of meeting financial goals with my hands and both feet tied behind my back. That said, God is good and once again provided the way. Chris taught me how to cut videos together, I took several virtual seminars, and applied for every grant under the sun. Not only did I end up meeting all the financial goals of my nonprofit, I ended up exceeding expectations. Chris was doing stellar in his job and I was blossoming as well!
Again, God is good!
Unfortunately, we were not immune to tragedy.
Chris' wonderful father, Peter, passed away after a brief fight with cancer. He had begun complaining of pain, and by the time doctors were able to sort it out, it had spread too far.
Before he passed away, however, God granted Chris the very special grace of being able to share news with him. In early August, we discovered that we were going to be welcoming a grandchild for them. Being able to share that he was to be a grandfather... I am so grateful that Chris had that opportunity.
Peter is deeply missed, most especially by his wife of almost 50 years, Diana. It was terribly hard for her and for Chris to face the holidays without him this year, so we did what we could to lighten the burden.
So yes, dear readers, I am once more expecting a little miracle. Vincent and Nate were VERY excited to learn that they'd have a new addition to the pack. Vince had his heart set on a sister, and Nate didn't care what the baby turned out to be because he's just thrilled he's not the youngest anymore. However, we found out that we were expecting a little boy who we decided to name "Dominic." We're already calling him "Nico" for short, and we are over the moon with anticipation for this little munchkin to arrive. And because God's awesome like that, He's finally giving me my May baby!
Christmas rolled around and while it was subdued, it was still blessed. We trimmed the tree, had fun decorating special presents for family, and built gingerbread houses and ate cookies. So many cookies. We were able to attend Mass on Christmas Day, and while I've been exhausted on account of pregnancy, I've had Chris to help with... everything.
My husband... a true and unparalleled partner in all the ways. I am so beyond blessed I'm honestly at a loss as to how any of this fell into my lap.
So that's my 20/20 on 2020. Were there challenges? Sure. But overall, we had so very much to be thankful for. The new life growing within me is proof enough to be optimistic for what tomorrow brings. In all things, God is good.
1/18/2021 11:28:29 pm
ARE YOU BACK FOR REAL THIS TIME? Don't get my hopes up. I've missed your blog so much! I saw you tweet out a link and almost died. PLEASE STAY BACK!
1/19/2021 12:09:40 am
I'm just here to point out that you're married AND pregnant. Is your ex still with the girlfriend who was expecting to be married to him with a baby at this point?
LoL - you're terrible.
1/21/2021 09:36:38 am
Nate's five. That means they've' been together more than 5 years. She waited more than FIVE YEARS for him to finally give her a ring? That's sad. And with the pandemic, he knows he can probably wait out a longer engagement too. Anyone want to make an over/under on him trying to wait out her biological clock? Or is the assumption that he's already gotten a vasectomy and he's just hoping she doesn't figure that out?
1/21/2021 10:07:51 am
LoL - you have to stop. My mantra has and always will be "not my monkey, not my circus." Her life, her choices. At this point, they'd BETTER get married because the boys already know her enough to care. I wouldn't be surprised if his parents put pressure on him for precisely that reason.
Leave a Reply.
Top Rated Posts
My Darkest Secret
Do Animals Have Souls?
10 Things a Parent of an SPD Kid Wants to Say
Fun and Easy Lenten Crafts
Blessed Mother as Intercessor
Loss of Life
Women Priests II
Render Unto Caesar
The Godparent Poem
NYT Anti-Catholic Ad