I am a wimp.
For months now, I've been doing really well with one of my habitual sins. I've met the temptation and walked right on by, even calling out to Saint Michael in my dreams to chase away the jerky little demons.
I was getting a little proud of myself for having been able to "put that sin behind me." I was still worried I'd fall back into it, but considering what I felt to be an impressive track record, I let down my guard a bit.
Apparently that's what they were waiting for.
The temptation has been really strong the last two weeks. Unfortunately, I willing got involved and, as usual, feel like a jerk. It's incredible to me just how easily I can ignore warning signs and flat out defy that which I know to be right when temptation strikes.
Here I was, proud of myself for having triumphed for a while. I was completely unaware that God had protected me from the stronger temptations and had reminded me to call upon St. Michael, my own guardian angel, the saints, Our Lady. Now that I've gone ahead and dragged myself through the mud, I'm able to look up and see that my arrogance was my undoing. Such pride in "my" ability to ignore temptation simply tenderized me for the real temptations later. Humpf.
But hey - God is merciful and I think He knew I needed a kick in the pants. I needed to be knocked down a few pegs so as to more readily fly to His aid when the devil comes a-knockin'.