While sharing a story about Vince, one of my friends said "I was reading about [his sensory issues] on your blog."
I remember doing a double take and saying, "I'm sorry. What was that?"
I thought I'd heard her wrong. Only a few of my friends know I blog, and given the subject matter, of those that know, maybe half would care to read. So imagine my surprise when she reiterated,
"On your blog. I read about the stuff with Vince on your blog."
I don't know how long it seemed to her or anyone else at the table, but the next few seconds felt like 10 minutes to me. I would say "So many things were running through my head!" but in all reality, only one thing was spinning crazy circles: She knows about Myla.
I didn't want to appear as if I was freaked out, so I did a mental exercise of "Stuff-the-dirty-laundry-into-a-closet-and-your-guests-won't-realize-you-live-in-a-pigsty" and continued the conversation as if I didn't just have a minor panic attack. In truth, though, I was rattled. Given how silent I've been about Myla to friends and family, I felt emotionally undressed when I realized someone else knew my secret.
And yet, to protect that secret, I needed to immediately act as if nothing was amiss. Had I acted on the impulse to hyperventilate, I would've gotten questions, and questions would've been ugly. No one wants that sorta drama at a bridal shower (or anywhere, really), so I mentally ticked off a prayer to God and said, "Welp, I hope You're amused."
This incident has been banging around in my head the last few days. I finally asked the friend how she found out about the blog. After all, it's not like I post it to my personal page or anything like that. Apparently she'd found out the same way (and about the same time) my other friend had a few months back (I posted about it here).
*Shakes fist at Facebook*
At least I know I fixed the problem already, but still... having her unknowingly confront me with this in a completely unexpected situation has made me really skittish. How many other friends / family are reading this?
It's just a surprising notion. I thought I was just talking to other Catholic moms and the students googling Christian tradition.
I share this blog with very, VERY specific friends. Obviously it's open to whoever, but I am just surprised when folks beyond the "Catholic Mom" group are interested to stop by.