I Know My Call Despite My Faults and Despite My Growing Fears

I've had Mumford & Sons "The Cave" on repeat in my mind since writing about it in "Secular Music as Prayer?  Yes, Please."  My title for today's entry is taken from the song. 

When I first began listening to this song, Father Z kept popping into my head.  For those who read WDTPRS (and for those who don't, I highly recommend it!) you know how often Fr. Z acknowledges his own humanity.  He stresses the importance of Confession not only for the laity, but for EVERYONE, himself included.  He's constantly acknowledging his faults and amazement at having been called to the priesthood.

So I guess this line brings that to mind.  Priests know their calling despite their humanity.  I, too, know mine now and despite my inability to always follow it, I'm going to keep reaching out to the Hand Christ always extends.  And let me tell you... there are very definite fears surrounding that.

I wonder, then, about our priests.  I have no doubt the attacks they must endure on the road towards ordination.  The devil probably places such doubts into their minds.  "What if this religion stuff really IS all made up?  What if I'm throwing away my chance for a wife and children only to wake up one day and realize it's for nothing?"  Then, when you couple those natural fears with the scandals, negativity towards Christianity, and the secular desire to stamp out anything religious, it's a miracle we have ANY priests.

And yet we do.  We have great ones.  We need to remind ourselves of this on a regular basis.  Sure, there are bad apples here or there, but who are we to speak out against those chosen by Christ, Himself?  Do we know what is written in their hearts?  On their souls?

A friend of mine was (once again) decrying a priest in her parish.  It was all I could do to hold my tongue.  I don't know the priest in question very well, so I couldn't speak out against the allegations.  Instead, I tried offering logical reasons as to why he was doing the things she took issue with.  It was getting me nowhere.  The best I could do was immediately change the subject, so I did.  I started talking about my son abruptly because I wanted her to understand that I didn't approve of the direction she was taking our conversation, but I also didn't want to completely bust out my "reprimand stick" and shake it at her.  She's an elder, so to do so would have been rude.

I dunno.  It just really, really bothers me when folks talk negatively about priests.  Again, who are we to judge when we're face down in the mud ourselves?  All of us need a helping hand as we struggle onwards towards Heaven.  Let's not go kicking others as we stumble our way through this life - especially not our priests who act most concretely as the Hand of God, pulling us up and away from sin through the Sacraments which would otherwise be impossible for us.

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