My Broken Fiat
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Incarnation Meets the Cross

6/2/2013

4 Comments

 
Picture
About a year and a half later, my heart has been broken again.

The closing of Incarnation Parish comes as no surprise.  Even with the fundraising project I organized, I knew the buildings were too badly damaged - the community too fractured and jaded - to come back from the blow of losing our school.  

And yet even knowing that the closure was to be announced did nothing to lessen the blow.  Still my heart breaks knowing that the beauty of Incarnation's art, stained glass and communal spirit will be shuttered and stowed away.  

It's hard to explain to folks why such news is so crushing.  "It's just a building," they say.  "There are other churches you can go to" they soothe.

And to a parish-hopper like myself, that might make sense.  After all, I subscribe to the belief that ALL Catholic churches are homes of the Almighty God.  I believe that they're all various rooms in His House and since each one boasts His Presence in the tabernacle, I shouldn't concern myself so much with any one in particular.  They're each part of the Church (capital "C").  

PictureMy sisters and I after Easter Sunday Mass
Still, though, I feel a very deep loss.  The pain of loss is not just spiritual or emotional... it is physical.  On my way home, I felt as if my heart was slowly being skewered by a spear.  This physically hurts.  

And I wondered why - aloud.  

How can I explain such a painful, emotional reaction to news that a building is closing?

Because it's not just a building.  It's my spiritual home... the place I first heard the Gospel, the school that raised me in the ways of Catholic Tradition, the church that celebrated with me my 1st Sacraments, the community that was and, in many ways continues to be, my extended family.

Knowing that so many of us will now be displaced and- for lack of a better word - homeless, it is a terribly sad and hurtful thing.  I feel the confusion, frustration, anger and loneliness of my community.  All over the Archdiocese, parishes are closing, beloved pastors are being reassigned and church communities are being told they are no longer going to have their familiar places of worship, comfort and prayer.  The reason this is so heartbreaking to us is that many of those in these churches put their blood, sweat and tears into building their communities.  


PictureOur unparalleled stained glass
Incarnation, for example, still boasts the artist who painted some of our beautiful artwork in the sanctuary. Their families are still members of the parish!  Families who have donated statues, the grotto areas, even those who volunteered their time and expertise in repairing architectural damage, painting the interior, and replacing broken panels of stained glass...

These families are still a part of the living, breathing community of Incarnation.  The same is true ALL OVER Philadelphia.  In many ways we feel as though we are being kicked out of the home and family we've forged through our years of love, worship and sacrifice there.  Incarnation is our home because we MADE it our home in our united desire to worship God through serving one another.

*Sigh*

The Body of Christ on earth is bleeding out, and I sometimes feel as if the wrists have been slit here in Philadelphia.


Oh prayers, fellow bloggers.  This extends far beyond Incarnation... even beyond the Archdiocese of Philadelphia.  Satan's smoke has been suffocating our beloved Church for many, many years now.  Our apathy, pursuit of pleasure and arrogance opened the door for him, and now we're choking on the illusion of fulfillment he gave us.  

Mercy, Lord.  We are our own undoing.  Even with my rose-colored glasses, I know Incarnation was hurting for quite a while.  I accept the closure as punishment for the transgressions we allowed...

Our priests found guilty of so many abuses.
Our laity falling lax in love, faith and worship.
Our communal apathy regarding keeping your house pristine and structurally sound.
Our disregard for true financial support given your many blessings to us.
Our arrogant superiority based on our blessed history in Olney.  

We really were once "the" parish in N. Philadelphia.  I suppose, given our history, we felt ourselves untouchable.  I know as a child there, I never imagined there would come a day that Inky would close its doors.  How in the world could I have foreseen such a tragedy?  This place was, in so many ways, a touch of Heaven.  

Picture1st Communion - Mary and I
I remember as a sacristan, walking through the churches (upper and lower) after all the Masses were finished for the day.  I felt so close to Heaven in those moments - completely alone with Jesus in the tabernacle. 

I remember all my wonderful sacraments celebrated there... Holy Communion, Confirmation, my 1st Reconciliation.  Baptism happened at Inky, too, but you'll forgive my 3 week old self for not remembering that one so well.  *Grin*

I also remember as a rectory sitter the many times strangers would come to the door asking for food or clothing.  How gratified I felt in making a simple sandwich or handing over clothes / canned food from the downstairs pantry!  How VISIBLE Divine Providence was as I took part in it at Incarnation!

And now to whom shall these people turn?  To whom shall they go seeking refuge, clothing or food?  

Yet another church is closed which cauterizes a faithful avenue for Divine Providence to use.  

How my heart bleeds its sorrow.  How my soul prays for hope that this terrible cancer in our Church is healed by our Merciful God.  


Picture
I don't know.  I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.  

I don't know what to say.  I don't know what to do.  I don't know how to feel, and I certainly don't know how to prepare myself for the closing Mass on June 30th.

Prayer, of course, but I just don't know how to reconcile my frustration, hurt and grief with the faith I have in God and Archbishop Chaput.

I love our Archbishop dearly.  I believe he's been put here in Philly for the specific task of pruning us something fierce.  He's made incredibly bold decisions that have had a very widespread effect on the entire Church in Philadelphia.  He closed our school last year, and now our church was sentenced to the cross this weekend.  

So together we much embrace this sacrifice like Christ, I guess.  We must acknowledge the task of walking in His Ways, even unto Calvary. 

And just as together with Christ we die, together with Christ we shall rise again.  This is my hope; this is my prayer.  

But prayers, dear bloggers.  Prayers for us in Philadelphia. Prayers for the Church as She fights off the growing cancer of apathy, the pursuit of worldly pleasures, and arrogance.  May the Spirit of Love alight in Her heart and purify Her of such malignancy.  

4 Comments
Michelle @ Liturgical Time link
6/2/2013 10:04:09 am

My heart is breaking for you. As we prepare to celebrate our last mass in our parish church on the 23rd--with the knowledge that on the 30th is it make its court ordered pass form our hands to those of a "parish" of people who have never even stepped foot in it-- I know what you are feeling. Stained glass and statues and hand stitched altar kneelers hold memories of sacraments received, lessons learned, and love cherished. It is difficult to walk away from a font where your child was baptized, and even more difficult to watch the hearts of grandparents break as they walk away from icons, chalices, and patens that their own grandparents gave to the parish with love. I am bereft for our parish and for yours. God bless you Gina.

Reply
Deo Volente link
6/2/2013 12:53:26 pm

"... Nevertheless, when the Son of man comes, will he find faith on earth?"

My friend and I have spoken on this subject often. With one billion Catholics in the world, it is hard to foresee a time when the Church could shrink down to only a small remnant that is left. I predict this will come to pass, however. Christ never predicted that the world would be completely Catholic when He returned. Perhaps He knew only a small number would remain faithful to the end?

At one time in the South, friends of mine attended Mass in small Chapels, and some had IRISH priests who served as Missionaries to their towns or cities. I remember attending Mass and the homily given by the priest could have been said in Dublin or Killarney if you simply closed your eyes; the brogue was so distinct. And now, because the "Spirit goes where He wills", the South is seeing one of the greatest influxes of Orthdox Catholicism anywhere! Nashville is home to one of the youngest Orders of religious Sisters in the Dominican Sisters of Nashville, and their order has a growing Order in Michigan as well, the Dominican Sisters of Mary the Mother of God. The Fathers of Mercy are in Kentucky (amazing speakers) and Monasteries are going up in Oklahoma, Wyoming and places West; Monasteries that originated in France are now migrating to the US!

In the Northeast, the Catholic faith which was sustained for many generations in "Catholic ghettoes" is now wafting away. The then "new" immigrants of Italians, Irish, Poles, Germans and other ethnic groups that settled in urban areas were defined by the question, "What Parish do you belong to?" I know friends in Brooklyn who look back at that question with a longing that aches. Their Parish and their neighborhood WAS their life.

What you are seeing, Gina, is what is happening as the children of these families migrate to suburbs and become indistinguishable from their confreres. They have no "tether" to their Catholic Faith, and so they are now becoming more and more "Cultural Catholics" (meaning they "self-identify" as Catholics but have few if any true beliefs in the true dogmas of the Church). So, the old Parishes of old have smaller and smaller congregations, their bills to simply keep the buildings intact is mounting and the only option that is left is to close the Parish.

If we again return to the South, it was a tough slog for those old Italians who settled in areas like South Carolina, Alabama or Georgia. That was part of the "Bible Belt" and Catholics were a distinct minority and had to stick together. Now, by God's Will, the South is becoming a new beacon of Catholicism.

You can go to any large Archdiocese in the Eastern US (Boston; New York; Philadelphia; Baltimore, etc.) and the same phenomenon is going on as beautiful Churches are first emptied and then finally shuttered. The thing to remember is, you are now becoming the "remnant" and hopefully like the South, a new "wind" blown by the Spirit will once again arise.

Peace! MayGod's Will be done...

DV

Reply
Kathryn H.
6/3/2013 05:42:44 am

What you are going through is extremely painful, and I will pray for you. I can empathize. I live way out west, and we don't even have churches like that, by and large. I have always been amazed when I've traveled back East how you could have such gorgeous, huge churches placed really close together, within a few neighborhoods. (I mean, "This is your PARISH??") They are a testament to the faith of large numbers of immigrants who gave so much to build them. It's sad for me to see churches like yours close, knowing that out here we don't even have churches like that....

Reply
Bee
6/3/2013 10:49:30 pm

What a beautiful church! This is heartbreaking. How I wish the need to close these magnificent churches would never happen. We are going through so much sadness as Catholics these days, so much loss on many different levels. When a beautiful church like this closes, it's like the death of a close family member. Can you imagine what it might cost to build and decorate buildings such as these nowadays? I can't even imagine. So many people sacrificed so much to donate to build them and maintain them, all for love of God. May God help us weather the grief news like this brings. God bless.

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